Summer 2017
Turning off of State street before the signal changed, They had arrived at Megan’s neighborhood sale. They had been calling it the first annual alleyway sale. For Sharon it seemed presumptuous to call anything the first annual. They were being too cocky with their commitments, but that's what most people do. On the other hand, Megan was more than excited to make more commitments. After all it took her less than a year to move in and become engaged with her now husband Robert. Sharon was already wondering how Megan convinced her to go, but it was clearly Megan’s guilting tones saying, “You have to go! All of my neighbors are so nice, and you’ll get to meet so many people.” Looking over the neighborhood as it passed by, She knew what Megan was trying to do and she smiled because she just couldn’t say no.
“Hey, your house is farther up, why are we parking so far away?” Sharon asked while looking up from her phone.
Megan while getting ready to go reminded her, “Well the garage is full of crap for sale. Besides, it wouldn't make any sense to start in the middle.”
They got out of the car and saw a constant flow of people walking to the sale. “Right, of course. So are you two gonna take turns or something,” Sharon asked, still trying to understand their arrangements.
“He has today and I have tomorrow. Got any more questions before I run off, miss nosey?” Megan asked.
Sharon thought for a second and continued asking, “Ok, but he could miss something that he wants if he waits till tomorrow. Also I’m going to keep asking questions, don’t you know me? I’ll track you down if I have to.”
“First, I can always just text him if I see anything. Second, I just wanted to get the obvious ones out of the way,” Megan said with a smile.
Sharon looked away and blushed for a second. Ever since they met in college, Megan seemed to always know what Sharon was up to. Sharon studied mechanical engineering while Megan was pre-med. Megan without a second look could describe Sharon’s intentions out in graphic detail. From her failed attempt to make a grading machine for her TA job to the halloween party where Sharon dressed as Zelda in hopes to find her Link, Megan could see the spark of every idea. They didn’t see each other much after college until about a year ago when Megan transferred to a closer hospital with her fiance. Ever since they’ve hung out every weekend, even helping them find the house they live in now.
The first few sales were mostly baby clothes that they both knew to avoid. Sharon knew that Megan was on the hunt for something by the way she scouted each sale. There were simply too many sales to stop by each in one day. Each item that Megan looked over left Sharon with a puzzled expression. First was the giant oil fish painting which had to be at least four feet by five feet, then there was the large pepsi cooler, and finally there was this old piano with colored keys. As far as Sharon knew Megan usually looked for old furniture and vinyl records. Glancing over a pile of books, Sharon finally saw her buy something after twelve stops. A finger tapped her shoulder and Sharon nearly fell into the table covered in glassware behind her.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to spook you. I just wanted to know what you were staring at,” this old lady said while holding her arms in case Sharon almost falls again.
Sharon wasn’t expecting someone to call her out so she said, “Oh, well my friend I guess, “ while scratching the back of her head.
“Which one is she?” She kindly asked, pointing toward the register.
Blushing, Sharon directed the old lady, “She’s the one on the left with the short brown hair.”
“Oh, that one. She’s cute,” the old lady said with a grin.
Sharon looked at the glassware because her face started to burn. “Ya, so I’ve heard,” she quietly said.
“Oh right, I’m Josephine, but everyone calls me Joe,” Joe said while holding out her hand.
Still flustered, Sharon took a second to realize that Joe was going for a handshake. While awkwardly shaking her, Sharon responded, “Uhm… I’m Sharon.”
“Don’t worry you’ll get her someday,” She said while patting Sharon's arm.
“Uhm.. thanks,” Sharon returned.
Joe walked away, leaving Sharon unsettled by her blunt discussion. Finally she could find out what Megan bought. Peering around the stack of books again, Megan had already finished buying her item so Sharon hustled out of the garage to see a large stuffed pink elephant in Megan’s hand. Sharon wondered which carnival this prize topper came from and how many tickets it cost. Held by its leg the new owner seemed more concerned with finding her friend as it spun in circles. Megan waved over to Sharon as she caught up.
“Sorry I thought you had moved on to the next sale,” She apologized while beginning her walk to the next sale.
“I just got caught up looking at… “ She spoke before realizing she needed an excuse for such an embarrassing encounter.
Megan joked while still twirling the elephant, “Oh come on, what cute thing did you find that you’re not telling me about.”
Almost stammering, Sharon quickly finished her statement, “Well, this old lady kept bugging me about those dorky cups they had.”
“Oh which ones, Rob is always looking for cooler dishware,” Megan asked quickly.
Panicking, Sharon thought of the least useful dishware that could come to mind and answered, “Well, they’re actually little jam jars, you know those old Welch's pokemon jars.” Sharon thought that this had to end the conversation.
“Oh my brothers used to make me watch that. Which ones did they have?” Megan cheerfully asked.
“Psyduck! It was all psyduck. Like five of them,” She blurted out.
Megan thought for a second but then responded, “Oh, is that the confused duck?”
She answered while crossing her fingers, “Yep, that’s the one.”
“While that does sound cute, I don’t think Rob would want a bunch of confused ducks in our cupboard,” Megan explained and then chuckled at the thought.
Sharon let out a sigh of relief as they continued their way down the alleyway. After a few more sales. There were some medical books and older fictions that Megan picked up as well as a few purses. It was almost noon and she still had not found anything that she was willing to carry for the rest of the day besides an old VHS copy of the 1990’s teenage mutant ninja turtles cartoon. A few stops before Megan’s house, a classic acoustic guitar caught her eye. She quickly tuned it as Megan circled the garage. Looking down at the frets, her fingers slowly remembered the position of each note. Megan walked up as Sharon got the hang of it again and began playing.
Smiling Megan asked, “Wow that was a neat song. What’s it from?”
“I thought you would sing along, does this ring a bell?” Sharon asked back as she started the song over. Sheepishly she sang along this time.
Megan seemed puzzled but asked, “Is that from that weird movie you showed me back in college and it starred, I wanna say… Shane Black?”
“No, it’s from The Pick of Destiny, and it's Jack Black. Shane Black is mostly just a director,” Sharon answered, slightly disappointed but chuckled at her response.
“Wait, is that the song you played with that kid that dressed as Link for halloween?” Megan asserted with a slight grin. Pausing for a second while trying to remember it more clearly, Her face grew bright red before looking away. “It was, I knew it!” Megan continued after seeing sharon’s face, “Oh now I remember what happened you dressed as Zelda because you knew what he was going as-”
“Okay, you can stop now I know the rest of the story,” Sharon said, trying to stop Megan.
Megan asked, “You sure?”
“Yes definitely sure that I don’t want you to tell the rest of that story,” Sharon reassured her for hopefully the last time.
“If you’re sure I’ll just save it for another time,” Megan said with a mischievous grin.
They kept moving along as Sharon thought it would be better to push those moments to a later date and hope it’s forgotten. After a few more sales, Sharon saw Megan’s garage in the distance. It only took one embarrassing moment for Sharon to completely forget about her previous confusion. The elephant still spun around as it hung by its leg. Suspiciously Sharon did not see Megan look at anything thoroughly again after buying that elephant. As Megan's house grew closer, Sharon knew that she would have to ask before getting there. She didn’t want to ruin another surprise, but also she couldn’t not know what the surprise was.
A few paces away, Sharon finally asked, “So what is with the pink elephant?”
Looking at the elephant, Megan answered, “Ok, well I was hoping you’d let it go. I mean we both know how bad you are at keeping secrets.”
“Well I still want to know what's up. It’s the only thing you bought today," Sharon impatiently insisted.
“Fine, just don’t tell Rob, “ Megan asked while Sharon rolled her eyes, “we have a game going on where the person who can find the most ridiculous item gets to throw the first party in the new house.”
Sharon had known Megan for eight years maybe and Rob for only a year but still never knew them as a couple so she responded, “You two are the weirdest. How is getting to throw a party a reward besides don’t you two have relatively the same friends?”
“To an extent, but it's more of an elevated level of bragging rights,” Megan started to explain.
“I’m still missing the point. If it's at your house you still have to clean up afterwards and prepare everything,” Sharon questioned, still trying to understand this game.
Megan paused for a second finishing up her analogy in her head by saying, “Imagine if you got in an argument over, let's say how many pints of blood are in the human body. You guess eight correctly because you are constantly hearing dumb facts from your doctor friend. Now imagine that instead of just saying I told you so, you got to have a whole party with banners saying there are eight pints of blood in the human body, on average, “ Megan elaborated trying to make her point.
“You’re having a party for the amount of blood you have in your body,” Sharon asked, more confused than before.
“Okay uhm… it's like having a party to tell someone you got a better grade on a test,” Megan said in an attempt to rework her analogy.
Almost immediately Sharon got it and before Megan could try again asked, “Why didn’t you just say that to begin with?” Megan simply shrugged and continued on.
They had arrived at their garage but veered off before anyone could see them. Megan left her outside as she went in to hide the elephant. Through the sliding door Sharon could see a few boxes in the corner still packed and stacked. The yard seemed nice for the price they paid and the house seemed like a decent two story, but the neighborhood seemed off to her. It didn’t bother her that much since she didn’t live there so she didn’t think too much about it. Megan came back through the sliding door and Sharon got excited to finally get to see what the two were selling. As they stepped into the garage, Megan stayed back with Rob and Sharon Darted from table to table looking for fun memories. Megan watched Sharon for a few minutes until She finally finished going through all of their stuff, coming back with a few VHS tapes and one arty fish sweater with Duval Written on the tag. While checking out Sharon noticed that Rob had a friend with him who seemed to have been there for a while. Her heart sank because she knew what was going to come next. Awkward introductions would eventually lead to her to be left alone with him. Sharon was no stranger to the blind set-up. From here on out this day will be an anxious one, she just knew there was no getting out of this. Megan knew how much of a flight risk she was when it came to socially interacting with strangers. Quickly she thought through the scenarios to come and tried to devise a plan that would seem the least suspicious.
“Hey are you ready to get going again, Megan?” Sharon asked, hoping to just avoid the elephant in the room.
Sharon knew that elephant was going to be front and center when Rob asked Megan, “Wait a second, I thought you were going to stay back after lunch?”
“Shoot, you’re right. How would our competition be fair then if you waited till tomorrow to find your item,” Megan exclaimed as Sharon could not believe how far ahead Megan planned this out. Sharon knew it would be unavoidable now that Megan would stay behind to leave her alone with Rob’s friend. Megan was a terrible liar but made up for it with her ability to construct airtight plans without telling anyone.
Slightly ashamed Sharon gestured towards the door and said, “I guess I’ll just keep shopping then.”
“Wait for us,” Rob said as they got up from their comfy lawn chairs behind the cash register.
Shame and guilt forced her to agree to the situation she tried to run from clumsily and responded, “Alright let's get going then.”
Rob was not as skilled as his fiancee with social situations as they had gotten to the first garage sale without even introducing his friend. Before She knew it, he was already looking for his winning garage sale novelty, leaving the two of them in an awkward silence together. Each of them seemed to have separate interests as if without trying Sharon barely ran into them as they circled the first few sales. Eventually even Sharon felt like this was too weird as Rob had barely even talked to his friend before running off. As she pitied him, she began looking for an entry point for a conversation after all this had to be twice as embarrassing for him at this point. She thought what wing man would just abandon their friend so quickly.
Soon she began to get a sense for this guy. He was into board games but clearly only odd ones as he bought just the cards to a trivial pursuit game. The only sport he seemed to be into was golf but maybe he already had everything for the sports he really cared about. Finally she noticed that Rob never informed him of their game as he had the same look when Sharon tried to figure out the rules. Rob was in line waiting to buy a large taxidermy lake trout that was mounted to a wood plaque and his friend seemed baffled. Another thing Sharon noticed while watching him was that he was kinda cute in a stupid way as he simply waited in confusion while Rob purchased his item. She knew that this might be a good time to break this silence as she already felt awkward from watching him for so long. He couldn’t be that bad after all he could just be shy, so she walked up to him. After a few moments, she nudged him, forcing him to say something first.
He seemed startled at first but stuttered, “H...hi.”
“Are you trying to figure out why Rob is buying that?” Sharon asked, trying to force through his defeated single hi.
He scratched the top of his head and asked, “Well ya, I’ve never heard of him being much of an outdoorsy person. So what’s up with the stuffed fish?”
“You see, they have a bet right now to see who can get the most ridiculous item today,” Sharon said as she shifted her mission from avoiding him to trying to find his faults. Avoiding the elephant in the room made her feel bad for leaving this clueless sap out of it.
Rob’s friend continued to ask, “So what do they get if they win.”
“The winner gets to throw the first party themed to their item,” Sharon responded, still anxious about this whole situation but continued to push through it.
“So Rob wants to have a mounted fish party, I guess” He chuckled to himself in an attempt to add something to the conversation.
Sharon questioned his loyalty for a second but then remembered who caused this whole thing and offered up in return, “Don’t tell Rob, but Megan got this huge stuffed pink elephant. You know the ones that are impossible to win at those traveling carnivals.” He held his hands parallel in front of himself and slowly widened the gap until they were about three feet apart. Sharon nodded her head, affirming the impossibility of Megan’s find.
“That does seem impressive-” he responded before he looked down at his phone and then back to the cash register.
“What’s up?” Sharon asked, confused by his expression. A second later and she asked with her palm on her forehead, “Let me guess, he left without us and isn’t coming back?” This was somehow worse than what she had feared. Megan left Rob to do all of the hard parts of the Set-up of the blind date and he forgot to even introduce them. He only cared about their stupid bet. Now she was left with this clueless dork who had been left under her supervision. Sharon thought that this was either the best or the worst meet up that she had been on. She had complete freedom to dump this stranger with only the smallest amount of guilt. Unfortunately that guilt was enough to make Sharon stay, but if this was going to continue, she needed to at least learn his name.
“Oh right, I almost forgot. Hi I’m Ty,” He said at what seemed like out of nowhere.
The coincidence was enough to startle her but she replied in kind, “I’m Sharon. Sorry I thought your friend was going to introduce you at some point but he just left I guess.”
“Ya well he’s not really my friend. We just golf together at work,” Ty said while Sharon quickly lost control of her laughter. Sharon realized that Ty still hadn't figured out that this was a set up and couldn’t decide whether to pity his ignorance or to laugh even harder.
While she contained her laughter, she chuckled, “Well it’s pretty clear now that he isn’t your friend.”
Ty chuckled a little and responded, “I guess you’re right he did just abandon me with this beauty.”
“Well my friend sent me out with this dork,” she said regrettingly.
“Wow low blow-,” he said in retort before she cut off the pity train.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I just saw that you picked up the cards for the tv edition of trivial pursuit and thought wow this guy must-” she tried to defend her statement in the moment but stopped for a second and continued hastily, “Look, I’m kinda a dork too.”
Ty also seemed embarrassed as he said, “I was trying to be sarcastic I guess, I mean I am sorta a dork. I got those cards because I helped run a trivia night at a bar near my house.”
“Hey we should keep going before we miss everything, okay?” Sharon said, shifting the conversation. She grabbed him by the hand to drag him out of the garage since they had been standing there for a little too long.
They kept going sale to sale without Rob and without the silence that he brought. Only a few things really stood out to them like a red 1981 VW rabbit pickup and a twilight saga complete with notes on every page. Each of them laughed when Ty found a dvd copy of Dodgeball and laughed even harder when they found an eye patch and pirate costume at the next sale. Sharon stood and stared at another even larger ocean painting hanging at the back of the garage, but instead the subject this time was a group of sea turtles.
“Hey, what’s up with the painting?” Ty asked, also perplexed by the oil painting.
Sharon broke her trance and answered, “We saw another one of these earlier, but it doesn’t even compare to this one.”
“No way, there’s more of these things?” Ty asked, turning around to see that Sharon had run to the owner.
Sharon quickly sent a text before asking, “Hey is that painting for sale?”
The owners seemed confused but answered, “Well I guess if you really want, but you know that you could just have one commissioned by the artist she lives just a little farther down.”
“Yes I’ll take it!” Sharon exclaimed, adding while tapping Ty’s shoulder, “but I’m going to need your help, okay?”
“Why not?” Ty answered, ready for an adventure.
Sharon grabbed a backpack from the table and had Ty put all the junk they bought into it. Each of them grabbed opposite ends of the paintings and began walking it back to Megan’s house. There were a few weird stares but also a few that complimented their find. Each time losing track of the right direction. Something was bothering Ty about the sale that he had to know.
“Hey awkward question, but you bought that backpack right?” Ty asked while adjusting his grip.
“Ya, I paid for it when I bought the painting,” Sharon asserted. The rest of the walk back remained strained but the last couple of surprised glances brought their spirits up.
As they set the painting against the house, Ty asked, “So when do we compare our hauls?”
“Ya it is getting kinda late, but we’ll have to ask those two.” Sharon answered as she led him back to the garage, “You know I helped them pick this house,” trying to fill the silence.
As soon as they entered the garage Megan exclaimed, “Hey you two! I can’t wait to see what you found. Rob had to run to the store to get some basic party supplies and a blank banner, so we’ll have to wait to reveal our surprises. Also you wouldn’t have guessed it but Rob wants those psyducks after all.”
“Alright, I guess we’ll go get those while we wait for Rob,” Sharon answered cheerfully.
As they wandered back towards the garage sale with the elephant, Sharon confessed, “Okay, so I’m just going to come clean now. That sale doesn’t have the psyduck jars.”
Ty seemed confused by the sudden turn of events, but asked, “You mean those like limited edition jelly jars and you said they had a bunch of psyducks? Why did you lie about that?”
“Okay so this is going to sound weird. I was trying to figure out what Megan bought but this old lady caught me staring at her and then Megan asked why I was taking so long, so that’s where the psyducks came from,” Sharon tried to explain in full.
After a few seconds of thinking, Ty responded slowly, “That’s a weird story but okay-”
“Oh hey check this out,” Sharon said, grabbing Ty by the hand and dragging him into a garage, “Let’s see how dorky you are.” Sharon grabbed the classic guitar from earlier and began plucking the same song. Ty bobbed his head along as she played classico by Tenacious D. She asked with a smile across her face while playing it again, “Can you guess the song?”
Ty continued to bob his head and answered in jest, “I think it's from that very famous movie with a top selling album accompanying it. I think the movie was called The Pick of destiny and the song would be classico!”
“Okay so you got that soft ball, but I have one more for you but you gotta sing it this time, okay?” Sharon asked while beginning to play the next as his face lit up.
Waiting a few moments to get the timing, Ty began singing Hey There Delilah only missing the beat of the first line and mistaking it for hundred miles away. Sharon laughed over the guitar after hearing his singing. Ty asked embarrassed, “Was I that bad, come on?”
“No, it wasn’t that bad,” She said while still laughing, “You just missed a few words.”
He laughed at himself for a moment then asked, “Okay I got it this time trust me.” Sharon started the song over and he began to sing again. Immediately Sharon caught his intentions as he replaced Delilah with Sharon in the first verse and by the time he hit the chorus, they sang in unison.
Sharon giggled as she kept playing but asked, “Do you think we’ve waited long enough for Rob to get back?”
“Yeah I guess we could probably head back now,” Ty answered smiling, “I can’t wait for them to see our great find.”
Sharon set down the guitar and they began walking back to the house. Sharon asked a thoughtful question, “So when we win, do you think the party should be sea turtle or pastel oil painting themed?”
“Definitely pastel oil painting themed. Sea turtles are pretty hard to get this time of year,” Ty answered, making Sharon laugh as they approached the house.
Grabbing their painting, they met Megan and Rob in the backyard. Each of them poorly hid their finds behind themselves, only to reveal them after a short countdown. It was clear after just a moment of looking over each item that Sharon’s was the craziest garage sale find in ages. After several minutes debating what theme the party should be, they decided on pastel oil painting but only because of the lack of sea turtles or any turtles they had access to. Megan had even convinced Sharon to help out with preparing the party even after a few protests. The sun had begun to set as they sorted through all of their purchases. Besides the painting most of her purchases were from Megan’s garage sale so she grabbed her new backpack but before she could head back there Ty was heading towards the front yard.
Ty said, excited for tomorrow’s party, “Well, I guess I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” As he walked back to his car Sharon ran up to him, holding her backpack open by the handle.
“Hey… I think we should do this again, next year,” Sharon asked anxiously while twirling her backpack by her side
Thinking about it for a second, Ty answered with, “Wow a year away that’s-” Sharon kissed him in a successful attempt to stop him from poking a hole in her clumsy plan.
As she walked away, she asked again, “So you good for next year, right?”
“Yes, I should be,” He said while watching her walk back to her friend’s house, ready to see her next year.
“Hey, your house is farther up, why are we parking so far away?” Sharon asked while looking up from her phone.
Megan while getting ready to go reminded her, “Well the garage is full of crap for sale. Besides, it wouldn't make any sense to start in the middle.”
They got out of the car and saw a constant flow of people walking to the sale. “Right, of course. So are you two gonna take turns or something,” Sharon asked, still trying to understand their arrangements.
“He has today and I have tomorrow. Got any more questions before I run off, miss nosey?” Megan asked.
Sharon thought for a second and continued asking, “Ok, but he could miss something that he wants if he waits till tomorrow. Also I’m going to keep asking questions, don’t you know me? I’ll track you down if I have to.”
“First, I can always just text him if I see anything. Second, I just wanted to get the obvious ones out of the way,” Megan said with a smile.
Sharon looked away and blushed for a second. Ever since they met in college, Megan seemed to always know what Sharon was up to. Sharon studied mechanical engineering while Megan was pre-med. Megan without a second look could describe Sharon’s intentions out in graphic detail. From her failed attempt to make a grading machine for her TA job to the halloween party where Sharon dressed as Zelda in hopes to find her Link, Megan could see the spark of every idea. They didn’t see each other much after college until about a year ago when Megan transferred to a closer hospital with her fiance. Ever since they’ve hung out every weekend, even helping them find the house they live in now.
The first few sales were mostly baby clothes that they both knew to avoid. Sharon knew that Megan was on the hunt for something by the way she scouted each sale. There were simply too many sales to stop by each in one day. Each item that Megan looked over left Sharon with a puzzled expression. First was the giant oil fish painting which had to be at least four feet by five feet, then there was the large pepsi cooler, and finally there was this old piano with colored keys. As far as Sharon knew Megan usually looked for old furniture and vinyl records. Glancing over a pile of books, Sharon finally saw her buy something after twelve stops. A finger tapped her shoulder and Sharon nearly fell into the table covered in glassware behind her.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to spook you. I just wanted to know what you were staring at,” this old lady said while holding her arms in case Sharon almost falls again.
Sharon wasn’t expecting someone to call her out so she said, “Oh, well my friend I guess, “ while scratching the back of her head.
“Which one is she?” She kindly asked, pointing toward the register.
Blushing, Sharon directed the old lady, “She’s the one on the left with the short brown hair.”
“Oh, that one. She’s cute,” the old lady said with a grin.
Sharon looked at the glassware because her face started to burn. “Ya, so I’ve heard,” she quietly said.
“Oh right, I’m Josephine, but everyone calls me Joe,” Joe said while holding out her hand.
Still flustered, Sharon took a second to realize that Joe was going for a handshake. While awkwardly shaking her, Sharon responded, “Uhm… I’m Sharon.”
“Don’t worry you’ll get her someday,” She said while patting Sharon's arm.
“Uhm.. thanks,” Sharon returned.
Joe walked away, leaving Sharon unsettled by her blunt discussion. Finally she could find out what Megan bought. Peering around the stack of books again, Megan had already finished buying her item so Sharon hustled out of the garage to see a large stuffed pink elephant in Megan’s hand. Sharon wondered which carnival this prize topper came from and how many tickets it cost. Held by its leg the new owner seemed more concerned with finding her friend as it spun in circles. Megan waved over to Sharon as she caught up.
“Sorry I thought you had moved on to the next sale,” She apologized while beginning her walk to the next sale.
“I just got caught up looking at… “ She spoke before realizing she needed an excuse for such an embarrassing encounter.
Megan joked while still twirling the elephant, “Oh come on, what cute thing did you find that you’re not telling me about.”
Almost stammering, Sharon quickly finished her statement, “Well, this old lady kept bugging me about those dorky cups they had.”
“Oh which ones, Rob is always looking for cooler dishware,” Megan asked quickly.
Panicking, Sharon thought of the least useful dishware that could come to mind and answered, “Well, they’re actually little jam jars, you know those old Welch's pokemon jars.” Sharon thought that this had to end the conversation.
“Oh my brothers used to make me watch that. Which ones did they have?” Megan cheerfully asked.
“Psyduck! It was all psyduck. Like five of them,” She blurted out.
Megan thought for a second but then responded, “Oh, is that the confused duck?”
She answered while crossing her fingers, “Yep, that’s the one.”
“While that does sound cute, I don’t think Rob would want a bunch of confused ducks in our cupboard,” Megan explained and then chuckled at the thought.
Sharon let out a sigh of relief as they continued their way down the alleyway. After a few more sales. There were some medical books and older fictions that Megan picked up as well as a few purses. It was almost noon and she still had not found anything that she was willing to carry for the rest of the day besides an old VHS copy of the 1990’s teenage mutant ninja turtles cartoon. A few stops before Megan’s house, a classic acoustic guitar caught her eye. She quickly tuned it as Megan circled the garage. Looking down at the frets, her fingers slowly remembered the position of each note. Megan walked up as Sharon got the hang of it again and began playing.
Smiling Megan asked, “Wow that was a neat song. What’s it from?”
“I thought you would sing along, does this ring a bell?” Sharon asked back as she started the song over. Sheepishly she sang along this time.
Megan seemed puzzled but asked, “Is that from that weird movie you showed me back in college and it starred, I wanna say… Shane Black?”
“No, it’s from The Pick of Destiny, and it's Jack Black. Shane Black is mostly just a director,” Sharon answered, slightly disappointed but chuckled at her response.
“Wait, is that the song you played with that kid that dressed as Link for halloween?” Megan asserted with a slight grin. Pausing for a second while trying to remember it more clearly, Her face grew bright red before looking away. “It was, I knew it!” Megan continued after seeing sharon’s face, “Oh now I remember what happened you dressed as Zelda because you knew what he was going as-”
“Okay, you can stop now I know the rest of the story,” Sharon said, trying to stop Megan.
Megan asked, “You sure?”
“Yes definitely sure that I don’t want you to tell the rest of that story,” Sharon reassured her for hopefully the last time.
“If you’re sure I’ll just save it for another time,” Megan said with a mischievous grin.
They kept moving along as Sharon thought it would be better to push those moments to a later date and hope it’s forgotten. After a few more sales, Sharon saw Megan’s garage in the distance. It only took one embarrassing moment for Sharon to completely forget about her previous confusion. The elephant still spun around as it hung by its leg. Suspiciously Sharon did not see Megan look at anything thoroughly again after buying that elephant. As Megan's house grew closer, Sharon knew that she would have to ask before getting there. She didn’t want to ruin another surprise, but also she couldn’t not know what the surprise was.
A few paces away, Sharon finally asked, “So what is with the pink elephant?”
Looking at the elephant, Megan answered, “Ok, well I was hoping you’d let it go. I mean we both know how bad you are at keeping secrets.”
“Well I still want to know what's up. It’s the only thing you bought today," Sharon impatiently insisted.
“Fine, just don’t tell Rob, “ Megan asked while Sharon rolled her eyes, “we have a game going on where the person who can find the most ridiculous item gets to throw the first party in the new house.”
Sharon had known Megan for eight years maybe and Rob for only a year but still never knew them as a couple so she responded, “You two are the weirdest. How is getting to throw a party a reward besides don’t you two have relatively the same friends?”
“To an extent, but it's more of an elevated level of bragging rights,” Megan started to explain.
“I’m still missing the point. If it's at your house you still have to clean up afterwards and prepare everything,” Sharon questioned, still trying to understand this game.
Megan paused for a second finishing up her analogy in her head by saying, “Imagine if you got in an argument over, let's say how many pints of blood are in the human body. You guess eight correctly because you are constantly hearing dumb facts from your doctor friend. Now imagine that instead of just saying I told you so, you got to have a whole party with banners saying there are eight pints of blood in the human body, on average, “ Megan elaborated trying to make her point.
“You’re having a party for the amount of blood you have in your body,” Sharon asked, more confused than before.
“Okay uhm… it's like having a party to tell someone you got a better grade on a test,” Megan said in an attempt to rework her analogy.
Almost immediately Sharon got it and before Megan could try again asked, “Why didn’t you just say that to begin with?” Megan simply shrugged and continued on.
They had arrived at their garage but veered off before anyone could see them. Megan left her outside as she went in to hide the elephant. Through the sliding door Sharon could see a few boxes in the corner still packed and stacked. The yard seemed nice for the price they paid and the house seemed like a decent two story, but the neighborhood seemed off to her. It didn’t bother her that much since she didn’t live there so she didn’t think too much about it. Megan came back through the sliding door and Sharon got excited to finally get to see what the two were selling. As they stepped into the garage, Megan stayed back with Rob and Sharon Darted from table to table looking for fun memories. Megan watched Sharon for a few minutes until She finally finished going through all of their stuff, coming back with a few VHS tapes and one arty fish sweater with Duval Written on the tag. While checking out Sharon noticed that Rob had a friend with him who seemed to have been there for a while. Her heart sank because she knew what was going to come next. Awkward introductions would eventually lead to her to be left alone with him. Sharon was no stranger to the blind set-up. From here on out this day will be an anxious one, she just knew there was no getting out of this. Megan knew how much of a flight risk she was when it came to socially interacting with strangers. Quickly she thought through the scenarios to come and tried to devise a plan that would seem the least suspicious.
“Hey are you ready to get going again, Megan?” Sharon asked, hoping to just avoid the elephant in the room.
Sharon knew that elephant was going to be front and center when Rob asked Megan, “Wait a second, I thought you were going to stay back after lunch?”
“Shoot, you’re right. How would our competition be fair then if you waited till tomorrow to find your item,” Megan exclaimed as Sharon could not believe how far ahead Megan planned this out. Sharon knew it would be unavoidable now that Megan would stay behind to leave her alone with Rob’s friend. Megan was a terrible liar but made up for it with her ability to construct airtight plans without telling anyone.
Slightly ashamed Sharon gestured towards the door and said, “I guess I’ll just keep shopping then.”
“Wait for us,” Rob said as they got up from their comfy lawn chairs behind the cash register.
Shame and guilt forced her to agree to the situation she tried to run from clumsily and responded, “Alright let's get going then.”
Rob was not as skilled as his fiancee with social situations as they had gotten to the first garage sale without even introducing his friend. Before She knew it, he was already looking for his winning garage sale novelty, leaving the two of them in an awkward silence together. Each of them seemed to have separate interests as if without trying Sharon barely ran into them as they circled the first few sales. Eventually even Sharon felt like this was too weird as Rob had barely even talked to his friend before running off. As she pitied him, she began looking for an entry point for a conversation after all this had to be twice as embarrassing for him at this point. She thought what wing man would just abandon their friend so quickly.
Soon she began to get a sense for this guy. He was into board games but clearly only odd ones as he bought just the cards to a trivial pursuit game. The only sport he seemed to be into was golf but maybe he already had everything for the sports he really cared about. Finally she noticed that Rob never informed him of their game as he had the same look when Sharon tried to figure out the rules. Rob was in line waiting to buy a large taxidermy lake trout that was mounted to a wood plaque and his friend seemed baffled. Another thing Sharon noticed while watching him was that he was kinda cute in a stupid way as he simply waited in confusion while Rob purchased his item. She knew that this might be a good time to break this silence as she already felt awkward from watching him for so long. He couldn’t be that bad after all he could just be shy, so she walked up to him. After a few moments, she nudged him, forcing him to say something first.
He seemed startled at first but stuttered, “H...hi.”
“Are you trying to figure out why Rob is buying that?” Sharon asked, trying to force through his defeated single hi.
He scratched the top of his head and asked, “Well ya, I’ve never heard of him being much of an outdoorsy person. So what’s up with the stuffed fish?”
“You see, they have a bet right now to see who can get the most ridiculous item today,” Sharon said as she shifted her mission from avoiding him to trying to find his faults. Avoiding the elephant in the room made her feel bad for leaving this clueless sap out of it.
Rob’s friend continued to ask, “So what do they get if they win.”
“The winner gets to throw the first party themed to their item,” Sharon responded, still anxious about this whole situation but continued to push through it.
“So Rob wants to have a mounted fish party, I guess” He chuckled to himself in an attempt to add something to the conversation.
Sharon questioned his loyalty for a second but then remembered who caused this whole thing and offered up in return, “Don’t tell Rob, but Megan got this huge stuffed pink elephant. You know the ones that are impossible to win at those traveling carnivals.” He held his hands parallel in front of himself and slowly widened the gap until they were about three feet apart. Sharon nodded her head, affirming the impossibility of Megan’s find.
“That does seem impressive-” he responded before he looked down at his phone and then back to the cash register.
“What’s up?” Sharon asked, confused by his expression. A second later and she asked with her palm on her forehead, “Let me guess, he left without us and isn’t coming back?” This was somehow worse than what she had feared. Megan left Rob to do all of the hard parts of the Set-up of the blind date and he forgot to even introduce them. He only cared about their stupid bet. Now she was left with this clueless dork who had been left under her supervision. Sharon thought that this was either the best or the worst meet up that she had been on. She had complete freedom to dump this stranger with only the smallest amount of guilt. Unfortunately that guilt was enough to make Sharon stay, but if this was going to continue, she needed to at least learn his name.
“Oh right, I almost forgot. Hi I’m Ty,” He said at what seemed like out of nowhere.
The coincidence was enough to startle her but she replied in kind, “I’m Sharon. Sorry I thought your friend was going to introduce you at some point but he just left I guess.”
“Ya well he’s not really my friend. We just golf together at work,” Ty said while Sharon quickly lost control of her laughter. Sharon realized that Ty still hadn't figured out that this was a set up and couldn’t decide whether to pity his ignorance or to laugh even harder.
While she contained her laughter, she chuckled, “Well it’s pretty clear now that he isn’t your friend.”
Ty chuckled a little and responded, “I guess you’re right he did just abandon me with this beauty.”
“Well my friend sent me out with this dork,” she said regrettingly.
“Wow low blow-,” he said in retort before she cut off the pity train.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I just saw that you picked up the cards for the tv edition of trivial pursuit and thought wow this guy must-” she tried to defend her statement in the moment but stopped for a second and continued hastily, “Look, I’m kinda a dork too.”
Ty also seemed embarrassed as he said, “I was trying to be sarcastic I guess, I mean I am sorta a dork. I got those cards because I helped run a trivia night at a bar near my house.”
“Hey we should keep going before we miss everything, okay?” Sharon said, shifting the conversation. She grabbed him by the hand to drag him out of the garage since they had been standing there for a little too long.
They kept going sale to sale without Rob and without the silence that he brought. Only a few things really stood out to them like a red 1981 VW rabbit pickup and a twilight saga complete with notes on every page. Each of them laughed when Ty found a dvd copy of Dodgeball and laughed even harder when they found an eye patch and pirate costume at the next sale. Sharon stood and stared at another even larger ocean painting hanging at the back of the garage, but instead the subject this time was a group of sea turtles.
“Hey, what’s up with the painting?” Ty asked, also perplexed by the oil painting.
Sharon broke her trance and answered, “We saw another one of these earlier, but it doesn’t even compare to this one.”
“No way, there’s more of these things?” Ty asked, turning around to see that Sharon had run to the owner.
Sharon quickly sent a text before asking, “Hey is that painting for sale?”
The owners seemed confused but answered, “Well I guess if you really want, but you know that you could just have one commissioned by the artist she lives just a little farther down.”
“Yes I’ll take it!” Sharon exclaimed, adding while tapping Ty’s shoulder, “but I’m going to need your help, okay?”
“Why not?” Ty answered, ready for an adventure.
Sharon grabbed a backpack from the table and had Ty put all the junk they bought into it. Each of them grabbed opposite ends of the paintings and began walking it back to Megan’s house. There were a few weird stares but also a few that complimented their find. Each time losing track of the right direction. Something was bothering Ty about the sale that he had to know.
“Hey awkward question, but you bought that backpack right?” Ty asked while adjusting his grip.
“Ya, I paid for it when I bought the painting,” Sharon asserted. The rest of the walk back remained strained but the last couple of surprised glances brought their spirits up.
As they set the painting against the house, Ty asked, “So when do we compare our hauls?”
“Ya it is getting kinda late, but we’ll have to ask those two.” Sharon answered as she led him back to the garage, “You know I helped them pick this house,” trying to fill the silence.
As soon as they entered the garage Megan exclaimed, “Hey you two! I can’t wait to see what you found. Rob had to run to the store to get some basic party supplies and a blank banner, so we’ll have to wait to reveal our surprises. Also you wouldn’t have guessed it but Rob wants those psyducks after all.”
“Alright, I guess we’ll go get those while we wait for Rob,” Sharon answered cheerfully.
As they wandered back towards the garage sale with the elephant, Sharon confessed, “Okay, so I’m just going to come clean now. That sale doesn’t have the psyduck jars.”
Ty seemed confused by the sudden turn of events, but asked, “You mean those like limited edition jelly jars and you said they had a bunch of psyducks? Why did you lie about that?”
“Okay so this is going to sound weird. I was trying to figure out what Megan bought but this old lady caught me staring at her and then Megan asked why I was taking so long, so that’s where the psyducks came from,” Sharon tried to explain in full.
After a few seconds of thinking, Ty responded slowly, “That’s a weird story but okay-”
“Oh hey check this out,” Sharon said, grabbing Ty by the hand and dragging him into a garage, “Let’s see how dorky you are.” Sharon grabbed the classic guitar from earlier and began plucking the same song. Ty bobbed his head along as she played classico by Tenacious D. She asked with a smile across her face while playing it again, “Can you guess the song?”
Ty continued to bob his head and answered in jest, “I think it's from that very famous movie with a top selling album accompanying it. I think the movie was called The Pick of destiny and the song would be classico!”
“Okay so you got that soft ball, but I have one more for you but you gotta sing it this time, okay?” Sharon asked while beginning to play the next as his face lit up.
Waiting a few moments to get the timing, Ty began singing Hey There Delilah only missing the beat of the first line and mistaking it for hundred miles away. Sharon laughed over the guitar after hearing his singing. Ty asked embarrassed, “Was I that bad, come on?”
“No, it wasn’t that bad,” She said while still laughing, “You just missed a few words.”
He laughed at himself for a moment then asked, “Okay I got it this time trust me.” Sharon started the song over and he began to sing again. Immediately Sharon caught his intentions as he replaced Delilah with Sharon in the first verse and by the time he hit the chorus, they sang in unison.
Sharon giggled as she kept playing but asked, “Do you think we’ve waited long enough for Rob to get back?”
“Yeah I guess we could probably head back now,” Ty answered smiling, “I can’t wait for them to see our great find.”
Sharon set down the guitar and they began walking back to the house. Sharon asked a thoughtful question, “So when we win, do you think the party should be sea turtle or pastel oil painting themed?”
“Definitely pastel oil painting themed. Sea turtles are pretty hard to get this time of year,” Ty answered, making Sharon laugh as they approached the house.
Grabbing their painting, they met Megan and Rob in the backyard. Each of them poorly hid their finds behind themselves, only to reveal them after a short countdown. It was clear after just a moment of looking over each item that Sharon’s was the craziest garage sale find in ages. After several minutes debating what theme the party should be, they decided on pastel oil painting but only because of the lack of sea turtles or any turtles they had access to. Megan had even convinced Sharon to help out with preparing the party even after a few protests. The sun had begun to set as they sorted through all of their purchases. Besides the painting most of her purchases were from Megan’s garage sale so she grabbed her new backpack but before she could head back there Ty was heading towards the front yard.
Ty said, excited for tomorrow’s party, “Well, I guess I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” As he walked back to his car Sharon ran up to him, holding her backpack open by the handle.
“Hey… I think we should do this again, next year,” Sharon asked anxiously while twirling her backpack by her side
Thinking about it for a second, Ty answered with, “Wow a year away that’s-” Sharon kissed him in a successful attempt to stop him from poking a hole in her clumsy plan.
As she walked away, she asked again, “So you good for next year, right?”
“Yes, I should be,” He said while watching her walk back to her friend’s house, ready to see her next year.