The Chaos Deck

Spite might invoke an aura of pettiness for the sake of pettiness or maybe even an underdog resilience for those that should but never will. In this case it exhibits both meanings. It may be childish while also holding great importance. When faced with the opinion that fun can only exist in a controlled environment, spite takes over. I knew for a fact winning meant nothing if only one person could have it, so I built a deck for everyone of my friends but one. The one friend who thought Possibility Storm was a bad card. Just two hours after once again arguing over how commander isn't just for the winners: a cedh rebuttal, I had constructed a deck that would be known to all from that point on as The Chaos Deck.

Now I know you probably already skimmed the decklist and are asking “Beach, why aren't there a lot of coin flipping / dice rolling effects?” because this isn't a deck about chance, it's about chaos. Chance multiplied will eventually give you the outcome you want, probably. Chaos is about living in the unknown, living in a world where friends become enemies, time flows out of order, and events without meaning are constant. This is the principle compass for my Norin the Wary commander deck. What happens, happens.

Win conditions

Yes! My chaos deck has a couple win conditions. Every commander needs a win condition or two unless you’re a pacifist I guess. I would argue that depriving this deck of the possibility of winning would ultimately limit the amount of chaos by reducing the number of possible outcomes, so here are the basic win conditions of the deck. The three common etb deal damage enchantments are there and so is the Rose Room treasurer which is less likely to deal damage but can. There is a 4th etb damage card from New Cappena but I’ll add it whenever I remember to buy it. As well there is a favorite win con which is Genesis Chamber which is a carry over from Norin soul sisters Modern deck. Not only does it generate value for me but for my opponents as well which is a theme that will come up again, and who doesn’t love those adorable little Myr.

Cards of Havoc

These first two cards are the crown jewels of the chaos deck: Possibility Storm, and Timesifter. These cards alter how the game can be played. Possibility Storm reduces the knowledge of all cards down to their mana value and type. All other effects are a mystery until you’ve cast it. Suddenly the game enters a new round of working with what you can get and the knowledge of your decklist could help but you’re most likely to have the type you have most in your hand so chaos is inevitable. Kill spells become counters, board wipes become regrowths, and mana dorks become craterhooves. 

The second card Timesifter sets the turn order on its head with the saving grace being that you will still know who you’re passing to. Suddenly games can play out like Planet of the Apes or the time machine. Some players can end up stuck in the stone age compared to the aged behemoths dueling for victory. Two things become important: deck construction and upkeep effects. Those with the higher mana cards can pile on the turns but can still lose the advantage to their high land counts. Those with punishing cards like Mogis, god of Slaughter, Sheolred, the Apocalypse, or Nekusar, the Mindrazer can both put a target on their back and kill those who have all of the turns. Now that it becomes a one sided 1v3 everyone can only sit back and hope for their time at bat or time on the cursed throne.

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A Mad Mad World

These 4 cards change the dynamic of the game on a pivot. Changing ownership of cards with cards like Scrambleverse can send the advantage bar spinning. Strategies collide when the red player can end their turn with a consecrated sphinx primed to set a race against the control player with a master of cruelties. Cards like Over the Top and Pyxis of Pandemonium simply turn the volume up as they dump player’s decks on to the field. 

To truly keep players on their toes two play test cards were added. Mana Abundance changes the game for those with the right affects to abuse it. Cards with flash and mana sinks become a luxury like no other, while control decks fall into a pile of counters at a moments notice as they feed each other the mana to continue to the last spell in hand. Just like his predecessor Tibalt, the Fiend-Blooded (which you know that meme is in the deck) Tibalt the Chaotic will keep even its control on their toes as each ability has one of three random outcomes spelled out only by the card name. I would list their effects if it even mattered slightly this card is simply a chaos engine with endless possibilities at the perfectly wrong time.

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Six monkey paws

First there are the three cards promising returns for your generosity. Curse of Opulence and Bucknard’s Everfull Purse hand out treasure for those that agree to their terms. Who gains the most from these agreements and when is too late to even have the choice? Pendant of Prosperity on the other hand is an offering hand to those who left behind which can even lead to an agreement of partnership. This may be appealing but others might see it as appeasement and punish you for handing over resources. Questions of loyalty can quickly lead to aggression leading into the politics of free power

These cards set the world ablaze with fire. Mass Hysteria gives powerful decks the needed push to start the next war today. Cards with attack triggers become devastating to those expecting time to respond. Paired with Blast-Furnace Hellkite, Opponents begin discussing the end of such wars as the dominos fall into place and everyone wants to be the one left with removal. Eye of Doom sets these unstable alliances into discussion as matters of opinion are laid out on the table clear as day. You hate rhystic study because it belongs to the strongest player. I hate it because you made them the strongest player. We are not the same. Debate will be as unhinged as any power scaling discussion and you’ll never hear “He’s about to win” more in your life than when you need to bargain with the red player for removal.

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Pet Cards

Hanweir, the Writhing Township is the inscription on the inside of the crown. I mean two middle of the roads combining to make one big card is probably the silliest thing to strive for but I could never see taking it out. As a result it sits silently in the background until someone asks “Wait… do you have the other half in there?”

Next are the myr makers: Myr Turbine and Myr Matrix. These complete the mini theme of mrys with Genesis Chamber. As well they reflect the past of magic design where a 5 cmc artifact can only do some things. Even the synergies once present in a 2013 era deck can be seen on Myr Turbine with its second ability to tutor a myr that now only shuffles your library due to changing times.

Because it’s a Red Deck

These cards are here because you should still be running removal, but because it's a red deck we are left with some of the strangest and most punishing removal cards. Cards like Boil and Decree of Annihilation lean over the edge of casual play. One of the best removal effects red has is player removal so cards like Sulfuric Vortex, and Ankh of Mishra set the goal ever closer of “remove target player”. Why would you care if you get dinged in the process?

Mana!

There are 36 lands and 8 mana rocks. The land base consists of 14 basic mountains, 1 basic wastes, and 21 non basic lands. Because of loose color requirements of a mono colored deck most of those non basics provide some utility or humor. Cards like Madblind Mountain and Command Tower provide the silly gameplay you’d expect from a chaos deck. Lastly we have Springleaf Drum (in german for some reason). As one of the only two targets for Urza’s Saga in the deck this card helps replace the mana ability of Urza’s Saga with our commander’s eternal suffering always supplying us with a creature to tap. ​

Decklist